Internet Safety Presentation (1956)

Internet Safety is a parody of educational videos from the 90s, set in the 1950's. It stars Safety Man (portrayed by Kelf Brick) and Dodgy Internet Bloke (portrayed by Yinf Bandit) talking about the internet and what you should do to keep safe while using it

Trivia

 * It has a spiritual sequel/prequel called How To Tie Your Shoe Laces.
 * Sometime after the special was made it became an overused mess because of a few people, mainly Joel Stewart.

Transcript
[Title card pops up: Internet Safety - A 1956 YnK Production]

[Fades to shot of whiteboard with projection of presentation]

Safety Man: Hello, kiddies. I'm Safety Man, and I'm joined today by my friend Dodgy Internet Bloke. Get over here. Ow... And, this is my friend Dodgy Internet Bloke. Say hello, Dodgy Internet Bloke.

Dodgy Internet Bloke: Hellooooo...

Safety Man: So, today we are here to teach you about safety on the Internet. Internet safety and how to be safe on the internet. [taps board] Dodgy Internet Bloke, if you will.

Step 1: Keep things private. Make sure you don't give out any personal information. Your information should only be known by friends and family.

Now, the reason for this being, is people like Dodgy Internet Bloke can get ahold of it, and we don't want people like that getting ahold of your information, 'cause they can find out where you live or where you go to school.

Dodgy Internet Bloke: [mumbling in arousal]

Safety Man: Now, if someone messages you pretending to be your friends or family, clarify with them if it is your friends or family first - ask them at school the next day, or give them a call saying "is this you who is messaging me?" on Facebook, Twitter, etc. So, keep things private, keep your personal information private on the internet so other people doesn't (sic) get ahold of it. Dodgy Internet Bloke...

Step 2: Don't send pictures of yourself. Don't put pictures of yourself on the internet because once they are on the net, anyone can have access to them and could take them and edit them.

Get a picture I sent on the internet to Dodgy Internet Bloke, look. [A picture of Kelf appears on the board] Now, Dodgy Internet Bloke got ahold of this picture. This is a picture of me I decided to send to him, 'cause he pretended to be my wife. Now, I sent this lovely picture to him and he got ahold of it and edited it; I cannot show you on camera what he did to it, 'cause it's too bad. Now, don't make the same mistakes as me, and keep your pictures to yourself, 'cause once they're on the internet - especially Facebook - they can get shared all over, and people can--

Dodgy Internet Bloke: They're never deleted...

Safety Man: ...and if people- And if you put privacy settings on your pictures if you do post pictures to the internet would be the best option, so people don't get ahold of them and only your friends do, or your family.

Step 3: Don't talk to strangers on the internet.

I made the mistake of becoming friends with this guy because I spoke to him on the internet, and now he threatens to kill me every day.

Don't talk to strangers on the internet. There could be people on the internet that could be bad and want to do nasty things to you, so be careful and only talk to your friends.

The nasty things could include... I won't list them... ...as per se, but they could do sexual stuff, they could kill you... what am I leaving? They could do you harm. So, make sure that you only talk to your friends and don't talk to strangers on the internet.

Dodgy Internet Bloke: [incomprehensible]

Safety Man: [snaps fingers] Step 4: Look at appropriate sites. Some sites are really bad and could contain some videos that are not appropriate for your age group. If a site says "18+", then it is not suitable for children. Therefore, you should exit the site right away. Dodgy Internet Bloke went on a, rather, site that is not appropriate for him at the age of 15, and how he became so corrupt is because he went on these sites and this is how he became Dodgy Internet Bloke. These sites could have a very bad influence on you. You could become corrupt like Dodgy Internet Bloke and could become a dodgy internet bloke. So, be careful and stay off those sites for your own benefit and for others.

Dodgy Internet Bloke: Well, go on then...

Safety Man: Step 5... [points at slide] Viruses. There are some websites that contain viruses. Viruses are things that are put on your computer from untrusted sites. Viruses can break your computer or make it not work properly. What viruses can do is, they can de- can delete files on your computer. So, it makes a computer slow, or a load of adverts will pop up on your computer. I sadly made this mistake from going on Dodgy Internet Bloke's site a while ago, and I got viruses such as Optimizer Pro or CleanMyPC Reg, and these are viruses that you want to stay away from. Go on sites that you know are trusted, and if they have adverts or things that said, "click here for a thousand pounds" or anything like that, then do not click them.

The end. Remember, ask your parents before you use the internet, only search appropriate things and do not tell people your age. And remember, kiddies...

[A slide that reads

"P.S REMEMBER KIDDIES!

Have fun surfing on the Internet!


 * 1) 90s" with a picture of a young child using a computer appears]

Safety Man and Dodgy Internet Bloke: Have fun surfing on the internet!

[Laughing can be heard in the background as the shot zooms in]